First kisses and Cosmetic Dentistry

I got to thinking about kisses today. I spend around 2 hours a day in my car commuting to my jobs, and trust me, you get to thinking about a lot of completely random, unrelated stuff. Other topics in my head were, "How old is Sean Kingston?", "Is steak necissarily fattening if on a salad?" and "If I WERE going to get full sleeve tattoos, would they be in color or black and grey?" and finally, "What first kiss would I technically consider my first kiss?" While all these topics are completey riveting and worthy of further exploration, I do have a bit of trouble defining my first kiss. Here's why:

1.) Im pretty sure I kissed all of the boys in my preschool class. I definitely tried to, at least. Do those kisses count as a first kiss?
2.) I kissed most of the boys in my 3rd and 4th classes...and my 5th and 6th....but that was only under the safe and perhaps disqualifying blanket of the "spin the bottle" clause, (wherein all kisses are devoid of meaning seeing as how at least 1/2 of the participants are in fact participating against their own free will or better judgement.) Do these kisses count as a first kiss?
3.) The first boyfriend I ever kissed ended up being gay.
4.) The second boyfriend I ever kissed ended up being gay.
5.) The third boyfriend I ever kissed ended up being gay.
......Hmmm. Not a promising line up of contenders for the "first kiss" title.
6.) The first real kiss (being french, as some use this to define a true kiss) resulted in 2 sessions of somewhat excruciating cosmetic dental surgery. Here's how this went down. Boy meets girl, girl meets boy. Boy and girl talk constantly on America Online (this was about 1996-the apex of AOL's glory before the world discovered a loophole and it became obsolete.) Boy and girl go on class trip to Washington D.C. and finally (being 15 and full of awkward angst ridden need for PDA but being woefully incapable of excecuting it with one ounce of class or sophistication)...kiss. Except girl was not ready for it. And boy took a running start toward girl. From about 25 yards away...on a rooftop...at night. Boy smacks mouth against girl's mouth, chips off a large portion of girls front tooth. Cosmetic dentistry ensues. So surely, this cannot count as the first kiss.

On the other hand, my other real first kiss (I was 16) was with a boy I very much adored and was so wonderful I cannot even bring myself to tell it's tale because I feel the need to keep it, like a love letter, locked away in a secret place only I know of. But, I've decided to count that kiss as my first kiss. The other first kisses are simpy amusing, at best.

Oh, and Sean Kingston is 17, Steak is not infact less fattening if used on a salad, and I would never, EVER get sleeve tattoos on my arms.